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Seedy K’s Peerless Pigskin Prognostications: Week VIII

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Well, imagine our surprise — Not really I picked Baylor — to find out it was not Brigham’s Youngsters who were wearing Magic Underwear under their football togs.

They fell to the Bears of Waco because of a two-way pigskinner, who apparently had a set of those skivvies in his locker as he was suiting up, and said, “What the hey, let me see if these work.” Then Dillon Doyle proceeded to get four tackles and a sack, while playing D. And, on the other side of the ball, playing fullback — Who knew that position still existed? — scored a rushing TD, and a receiving TD. Baylor prevailed. Rather handily.

So, yeah, there was legerdemain in those undergarments, just not any helping the dudes from Waco.

I also correctly predicted victories by Michigan State and Georgia. Though, I must admit, that eleven and a half minute UK drive for a score at the end of the game, against the justifiably vaunted Bulldog D, was mighty impressive.

There’s always a flip side, to be sure, which includes Boston College’s battering at the hands and feet and everything else of NC State.

Which bring me to Texas. A running joke in the world of college pigskin is the knee jerk tendency to proclaim that “Texas is back!” The Longhorns are back alright. Way back. As in back to the drawing board. As in back of the pack. As in they blew another significant 4th Q lead, falling to surging Okie State.

Why would I ever have nabbed the Burnt Orange as a winner? I haven’t the slightest idea.

Three correct. Two incorrect. My tally for the season: 25-14.

I forge ahead.

This week’s winners:

Southern California @ Notre Dame. At one of the way too many college football columns I read daily, there was discussion of why coaches, even QB whisperers like Lincoln Riley, choose the wrong guy initially. (Though Riley, to be fair, might have known Caleb Williams to be the next Lamar Jackson, but just wanted to ease him in.) Anyway, the Fighting Irish QB situation was also mentioned in the article. First it was former Badger Jack Coan taking snaps. Then Tyler Buchner. Then Drew Pyne. Or, maybe the latter two were vice versa. Anyway, indecision on Brian Kelly’s part. Speaking of which character trait, Southern Cal is without permanent coach, after diddle dallying about Clay Helton for years, despite the now deposed coach’s mediocrity. So, whom do I choose? The team with no idea about coach? The team with no idea about quarterback? The latter.

Coastal Carolina @ Appalachian State. So, what league are these schools in these days? It’s hard to tell without a database that refreshes as quickly as Costco processes your credit card. Were they added to expanding AAC? Or, are they still in C-USA? Oh wait, the answer is none of the above. They dwell in the House of the Sun Belt. Where the upstart G5 power Chanticleers are still smokin’ hot after their laundering of the Magic Underwear Gang in last season’s scintillating made-in-a-minute Game of the Year. The Mountaineers aren’t quite as dominating within their realm as a few years back. Cock a doodle doo.

Wisconsin @ Purdue. Here’s a contrast for you. Football’s most boring offense. That would be a reference to the visiting Wisconsin Badgers. Versus innovator Jeff Brohm’s wide open attack. The Boilermakers are coming off their huge upending of former Flavor of the Week Iowa. The “experts” favor 3-3 Wisconsin, the paradigm of I-think-I’m-falling-asleep-while-viewing-the-Badgers-on-O football, over #25, 4-2 Purdue. I don’t get it. Bang on that World’s Largest Drum.

Oregon @ UCLA. I have commented often about my knee jerk compulsive consumerism. Especially when it comes to garments I can wear that I probably wouldn’t see on others around town. So, when Oregon said Goodbye Columbus, I ordered a Duck hoodie before the final buzzer. I love the logo of the Quack’s mascot. When UCLA bested now coachless Louisiana State, I went for another sweat. Always loved the Bruins’ school colors, Cali gold and sissy blue. Which means I’d be switching outerwear, were I watching this game at home. Which I won’t because it conflicts with U of L. OK, maybe I’ll check on my phone now and again from the pressbox at Cardinal Stadium. U C L A.

Boston College @ Louisville. It would seem that Sin City’s oddsmakers consider the Eagles 4-2 record to be misleading. They’ve tabbed U of L as a favorite by more than a touchdown. Maybe it’s BC’s consecutive Ls to Clemson and the Wolfpack, the latter a beatdown. The Cardinals will be rested after a bye. It’s never easy these days for work-in-progress Cards. But, Louisville prevails.

— c d kaplan