#34 George Clements
Class: RS Senior
Hometown: Willow Spring, NC
Thoughts: See Day 85. Chris Miele tried the same trick a few days ago George. Now you even went so far as to change positions and numbers to get a second look during the countdown. Just ain’t tolerated around these parts Clements….
Sweet Tweet: Not to leave you high and dry with only 34 days till kickoff, I wanted to provide some content that UofL fans may find very interesting. As you all may know, this will be the first year of the college football playoff. The teams will be selected to participate in this playoff by a committee that was put together last year with a vast level of experience at the college level, including everything from coaching, playing, watching and administering. After careful and meticulous evaluations of each member, I was able to sit down with them personally and ask if Louisville could count on their support this year to reach the playoff…the results are somewhat discouraging.
Jeff Long, Chancellor and Director of Athletics at Arkansas: Mr. Long used to be the AD at a little place called Eastern Kentucky. (Not exactly in the middle of Cardinal Country) He was also the AD at Pitt and now has the same role at the University of Arkansas, which has a shaky relationship at best with one Head Coach Mr. Bobby Petrino.
Does Louisville get your support?: "Hahahahahahaha. Nope" – Jeff Long
Barry Alvarez, Athletic Director at University of Wisconsin: Being at Wisconsin for so long you might think Barry would have very little bias towards our Cardinals. You would be wrong. What most don’t know is that Barry was the Head football coach at a little place called Lexington High School (yes, it was Lexington, Nebraska but once you get that Lexington stink on you there is no removing it).
Does Louisville get your support?: "I support Lexington till I dies, ok? Nose ways you can play in the ‘Scansin weather. When Petrino scores fiddy in three foot powder we can talk, hey" – Barry Alvarez
Lietenant General Mike Gould, Retired Air Force: Do you remember when Reece Gaines dropped 22 points on Air Force back in 2002 in a Louisville rout? Yeah, neither do I. But Mike Gould sure as hell does, and he ain’t forgetting anytime soon!
Does Louisville get your support?: "They have about as much chance of getting my support as Air Force had of grabbing a rebound against Ellis Myles. Translation, zero. Suck it Gaines!" – Mike Gould
Pat Haden, Athletic Director at Southern California: Haden is regarded as one of the more polarizing AD’s in the country, especially with how he handled the football coaching situation with Lane Kiffin and Ed Orgeron. With that said, I don’t know what he would have beef with Louisville about?
Does Louisville get your support?: "You know how much money Tom Jurich makes? You think it feels good to hear how he is so much better than me at my job? He’s got National Championships, conference titles, blah, blah, blah. I’m sick of it. Then, I go grab a bottle of Makers to drink away my troubles and his damn mug is plastered all over it. You’re not getting crap from me" – Pat Haden
Tom Jernstedt, Former NCAA Executive VP: Tom was the Director of all facets of NCAA basketball through 2010, but he is still very close with the Selection Committee from last year.
Does Louisville get your support?: "There’s four teams so we could probably make Louisville the 4th seed….bwahahaha!" – Tom Jernstedt
Oliver Luck, Athletic Director at West Virginia University: Shouldn’t have to explain this one. He obviously hates us every time he looks at the Big XII logo.
Does Louisville get your support?: [grunts, snaps pencil in half]
Archie Manning, Former Ole Miss QB, Father to Peyton and Eli: Ever heard of a little camp called the ‘Manning Passing Academy’? Well, they bring in the "top" prospects each year and that list just so happened to leave off one Theodore Bridgewater, even when he was considered the consensus #1 overall pick back in the summer of 2013. Instead, AJ. McCarron, Manziel, and every other freaking SEC QB in the land were invited. I’m sure there is no bias there.
Does Louisville get your support?: [scans through list of SEC schools, doesn’t see Louisville] "Sorry fellas, I’m sure you’re a really nice ball team, but not this year." –Archie Manning
Tom Osborne, Former HC and Athletic Director at Nebraska: A football genius to some, surely Tom would give Louisville a fair shot. The problem is that these meetings are held face-to-face every week and I’m pretty sure Tom Osborne has never left the state of Nebraska in his entire life. Seriously, high school, college, coaching, athletic director…he never leaves. If he isn’t present, his vote doesn’t count, so...
Does Louisville get your support?: "Sure, they seem like a good team. [Informed meeting is held outside of Nebraska] Well, maybe some other time guys." – Tom Osborne
Dan Radakovich, Athletic Director at Clemson University: Finally, someone from our own conference. I’m sure we can win his support. Oh, wait, he happens to be the athletic director at one of the schools we will most likely be competing with every single year for one of the coveted spots.
Does Louisville get your support?: "Sure, I’ll remember you guys in the meeting, unless of course you knock us out of contention in week 7. If so, then you can go pound sand." – Dan Radakovich
Condoleezza Rice, Professor at Stanford, former US Secretary of State: I can’t think of a single thing that would make Former Secretary Rice not a fan of Louisville. We may have finally found a solid backing in the committee.
Does Louisville get your support?: "The year was 2007, Stanford had the Lopez twins and were looking to surprise a few people in the tournament. Pitino kept pressing us and Louisville won by 20. I hate you and your plural version of Cardinal" – Condoleezza Rice
Mike Tranghese, Former Commissioner of The Big East: Thank you, finally someone who had a great relationship with Louisville and should provide some quality insight into the program.
Does Louisville get your support?: "See how it says ‘former’ next to Big East Commissioner? That’s because you and Syracuse and West Virginia and Pittsburgh all screwed us! Good luck." – Mike Tranghese
Steve Wieberg, Former Football Reporter, USA Today: Oh, you worked for USA Today? Crap.
Does Louisville get your support?: "If we had a 32 team playoff….they may be in the discussion. Is Terry Bridgewater still there?" – Steve Wieberg
Tyrone Willingham, Former HC at three FBS programs: Ty, we’re good right? Louisville has never wronged you before. I don’t even think we ever played one of your teams.
Does Louisville get your support?: "I sat in Brian Brohm’s living room for over two hours. We had him. He was coming to the Irish. He was going to turn around the program that Brady Quinn was single handedly dismantling…and you stole him from me. You crushed my spirit and you ruined my career. I despise Louisville and I despise Bobby Petrino" –Tyrone Willingham
I guess you could say things didn’t quite go as planned…
[All conversations are satirical in nature. CardinalStrong will not be held liable for any quotes or assumptions pulled from this article. CardinalStrong is well aware that Mike Gould could order an airstrike in or around his location at anytime he damn well pleases]