Seriously? No, no, no, let's be really real for a second...seriously?
The Louisville football team has lost yet another player, as sophomore defensive tackle Aundre Henderson has reportedly decided to give up the sport.
"Aundre has decided not to play college football anymore," said U of L head coach Steve Kragthorpe. "He has given up his scholarship, but will not be transferring to another institution. He will continue his education at U of L, and I wish him nothing but the best."
Henderson, a Manual High School product, was one of the most sought after recruits in the state of Kentucky in 2005, and chose Louisville over Tennessee, Kentucky, Michigan State and Boston College, among others. He appeared in four games as a redshirt freshman in 2007, and recorded three tackles. He had been penciled in just behind Earl Heyman on the depth chart at defensive tackle heading into summer practice.
Henderson's departure is an unnecessary purge to an already Olsen twin-thin defensive unit. While Ron English's starting front four of Heyman, Grady, Mitchell and Scott should be among the best in the Big East, there is very little experience behind those guys outside of L.T. Walker and Rodney Gnat, and that's definite cause for concern at positions where teams generally like to shuffle guys in and out.
So now we have guys so disheartened that they're giving up football altogether. Whatever happened to being able to leave your front door unlocked at night, knowing the names of everyone on your street, and Louisville football players leaving the program because they tested positive for weed? I suppose somewhere along the way I stopped spinning and the world just kept right on goin' without me.
All right honestly, if someone doesn't produce a piece of positive news at some point over the next eight weeks, I'm going to start being unnecessarily surly to each and every service worker I come in contact with. F bombs will be dropped in Wendy's drive-thrus, plates of piping hot food will be hurled at restaurants, and God forbid you look me in the eyes before handing me a ticket at the movie theater.
So Trent Guy: run a faster-than-expected 40-yard dash. Scott Long: land the lead role in the next Batman movie. Maurice Mitchell: cure cancer.
I'll be eagerly checking my Google News Alerts.