1. South Florida: If their uniforms said "Ohio State" on the front, is there any doubt who would be number one this week?
2. Ohio State: If recent history tells us anything, it's that the mediocre Ohio State team has a better shot at winning the national title than the uber-talented one. Good news for Buckeye fans.
3. Boston College: In a month Eagle fans will be looking back at this week as the golden days.
4. Arizona State: They catch Cal without Nate Longshore, they get a down USC at home, and Oregon has a history of second-half letdowns. Hmm.
5. Oklahoma: Is there anyone out there who doesn't think that this team is going to play for (and probably lose) the national title?
6. California: Losing Longshore just may have cost them a trip to New Orleans.
7. Oregon: Dennis Dixon stars in: "Rompin' Wazzou."
8. LSU: It's our first "who beat" triangle of the season where you inevitably end up ranking the three teams strictly based on who you think is better.
9. Kentucky: Son of a bitch.
10. Kansas: My bandwagon team is KILLING peeps. 302-57.
11. West Virginia: Sure we're 4-3, but at least we control our own destiny in the Big East race...suckas.
12. South Carolina: I'm sorry, I just don't see it. They should have lost to Kentucky, and Clay Aiken has a stronger arm than Chris Smelley.
13. Missouri: Had a real chance to keep the magic alive but someone forgot to tell them that reverses don't work above the grade school level in 2007.
14. Florida: If you guys don't handle business this Saturday then you're out and you're never getting back in.
15. Virginia Tech: Really thought Duke was going to give them a game. Really wrong.
16. Auburn: Still, Mississippi State?
17. Cincinnati: At least that Oregon State blowout is looking a lot better.
18. USC: Hey, you're not very good.
19. Virginia: Actually watched this team play on Saturday, and even I'm not sure how they're ranked this high.
20. Texas: Iowa State is the cure for any 0-4 streak in Big 12 play.
21. Tennessee: I'd despise them even more if they still had a Clausen.
22. Texas Tech: Great defense, great running game.
23. Wake Forest: The loss to BC is going to break the tie and keep them out of the ACC title game.
24. Michigan: Didn't think it was possible, and maybe it shouldn't be.
25. Boise State: I refuse to rank Hawaii again until they prove that they're better than this team on the field.