Armed with a fresh intro video and some brand new music, Bloggin' Rick Pitino took to his website on Wednesday to update Cardinal fans on his players' progress after their first three sessions of individual instruction.

Some highlights:

Peyton Siva - One of the top point guards in the country

-Shooting much improved

-Strong and fast

-Solid smart defender

-Great Leader

Needs to work on: not much

Russ Smith AKA Russdiculous

-Much stronger, pound-for-pound only Peyton is stronger

-Improved finisher around the basket

-Rebounds from the guard position

Needs to work on: My website not big enough (JK)

Gorgui Dieng

-245 lb at 5% body fat. Stronger and quicker

-Much improved off right shoulder inside

-3pt shot will come into play... Not!!

-Smart defender

Needs to work on: conditioning. Senegal must be a party country. I think he must have a butler when he goes home.

Wayne Blackshear

-Stronger and in better shape

-Improved one on one game

-Powerful around the basket

-Strong defender

Needs to work on: going left, arc on jump shot, and conditioning

Sounds like Wayne is getting back to his Fat roots (JK).

Pitino goes on to once again declare Kevin Ware as the most improved player on the team, refers to Dark Slime as Dark Slime, and gives his initial assessment of newest Cardinal Mangok Mathiang. You should probably skip reading the whole thing...Not!!

My God, Bloggin' Rick rules.