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Introducing the Perfect Cocktail...

Ladies and Gentlecloids,

Today, I present the latest concoction, the new craze, the splendiferous milk delivered to us from the gods upon high! It is not just a cocktail, it is more than a cocktail. A drink that not only amazes, but tests ones muster, ones dedication and lives up to the phrase "Tough as Nails."

It is called the Keg of Nails - the Cocktail of Champions.

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It is a litre of bourbon (A Louisville based commodity and elixer to save the soul) combined with a Blue collar Cincinnati Beer (which its bubbles are said to also have medicinal purposes) poured into the appropriate wood tankard, crafted by both Coopers and Drunkards alike! It is similar to ye olde Boilermaker, but with a direct tie to the waters of the Ohio River which have made this rivalry what it is.

Yes, you may want to vomit. Yes, you may want to give up. Yes, you may want pass it off to your strong stomached friend to give it a try first, just to see if you can handle it. But, upon finishing the drink, you will be a Cloid for the ages, and it will all but assure victory of our Mighty and Beloved Cards over the foe Cincinnati Bearcats. Rumor has it Charles Strong drinks this for breakfast.

Other occasions you can enjoy this cocktail for the ages:

  • Weddings
  • The Great Steamboat Race
  • Whenever you're about to cross over into Ohio...

So - I challenge you Cloids' to make this a reality. Also - I hear you look extra awesome drinking this with a Cardinal Bird Head Mask on...

Go Cards. Beat Cincinnati. Bring the Keg Home.