Ouch.

Where We Stand: Wall of silence broken and still disappointed. Not in the Big XII, SEC, ACC, or Metro Conference. Perhaps, soon in the same conference as Boise St. Facepalm became facedesk, facedoor, facesteering wheel, and finally, after all of the typing, this.

According to the high school rumor mill, Wendy Virginia totally told Tina Christianson-Univers that she really thought her new purple highlights looked nice—that all of these mean rumors Louise told her were totally false, and that her Dad, the Senator, was going to go all crazy over mean Farmer McConnell up the street for all those things he said about her teeth and choice in home furniture and home heating.

Louise went to her blog to vent her frustrations—I’m talking like total "Mean Girls/Easy A" meltdown here. For sure. What? No, I didn’t see those movies. Those are for high school kids.

What I am sure about:  Rumors are heating up for the Pac-12. I’m not kidding.

I’m kidding. Or not.

Who Some Seem to Foster ‘Moderate Disdain For’: Steve Kragthorpe, although I can’t think of why. His teams prepared us for this rollercoaster ride better than anything else. As loverofthegame pointed out:  We have a shot.

We fumble.

We don’t have a shot.

There’s always next week.

Feel better?

No?

Me too. See you next week.

What we Don’t Care About: The color PMS286 for Print and hex #005DAA for web. Especially when paired with black. I do care about notably Pantone 1797 or Pantone 1807, and Automatic Black, however.

How We’ve Chosen to Focus Our Disdain: Still reeling from the fact that Mitch McConnell has managed to make Democrats and Republicans in the city and Commonwealth clasp hands and raise glasses in joy, if only for a moment, we’ve forgotten our self-loathing. We also don’t seem to harbor much disdain for the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. I mean, don’t get me wrong Big XII, I enjoyed Dudley-do-right when I was a kid too, I even like the Mounties now (and don’t get me started on the WWE/F) but…

What’s that?

Oh, you took the Mountaineers? 

Well sir, to you I say,

&%(#.

Where to Place the Blame (and I’m thinking you, Sen. Jay Rockefeller):  Big Oil and Big East officiating.

No, that’s not right.

Rhymes with Steve, ends with, oh never mind. Really? You still want this laid out for you?

Where we Go From Here: My guess is that if you’re reading this and you can’t figure out why your iPhone, laptop, or other electronic device is displaying three copies of this and a dancing elephant, you’ve already arrived to the place where most of our readers are headed. Remain calm. Place the electronic device on the table. Your friends are coming to help you.

Unlike Jim Calhoun, however, we will be going to postseason basketball in 2013. "A" for effort, UCONN.

Film Recommendation for Tom Jurich:  The Godfather. Louisville, like Michael Corleone, has just seen the equivalent of its loving and powerful father, Don Corleone (the Big East), betrayed and shot as a result of the actions of couple of trusted thugs (Pittsburgh, Syrcause), an outsider to the family (TCU/Sollozzo), and—in a nod to the future film—a whiny older brother who only wants his way in Vegas (WVU/Fredo).

Like, Michael, Louisville didn’t want to get involved in this business. Really, we didn’t. We wanted to have a nice life with Kay, go out and enjoy our war hero status and the UPS Flight Deck.

Now, however, the family business (Big East conference) has become our business.

Let’s go to the mattresses.

Go Cards. Beat Purdue.  I mean, Syracuse.