FanPost

'Monitoring' the Situation v. 1.0 or "What's Happening Here, Tom?"

Well, today hurt a bit. And that might be an understatement.

When Schnellenberger said "collision course," I don't think he meant "facepalm."

Personally, I think we’re all a little tired of the speculation at this point. I’ve been staring at the “Twitter” shade of blue so much that my rods and cones are all screwed up.

What really bothers me, though, is that we—and by “we” I mean fans, the sports administration, the university, maybe even the city—really seem to lack any say in how all of this has unfolded. But, ESPN did (speculation). For a long time, Louisville was first to the Big XII. Then, after (what might have been ) a West Virginia failure to get into the SEC, they hop right past us in the high school popularity contest that is re-alignment and take what we thought was our senior superlative:  Most Likely to Secede from SunBeast. Or something like that.

 What brought us to this point? Where are we going now? Well, with the wall of absolute silence from the University—aside from an occasional, “We’re monitoring the situation,”—I present to you “A Card Chronicle FanPost Monitoring the Situation v 1.0.” 

Where We Stand:  Not in the Big XII, SEC, or ACC. Not in CUSA. The Artist Formerly Known as the Big East. Or the League of Four Friends and Jim Calhoun:  Louisville, Cincy, USF, Rutgers, UCONN. Our current record in football:  3-4.  Oh yes, AND WE BEAT UK. Also, hugely profitable athletic program, the Hottest Male Athlete of the Year (according to an internet poll, those things are always true), and perhaps a continuation of our year-long basketball love jones for that team from last year and what it’s become this year.

Who Some Seem to Foster ‘Moderate Disdain’ For:  Syracuse, WVU, Pittsburgh, Texas, Missouri, FULLLLLLLLLERRRRRRRR. A close sixth is Notre Dame, who may or may not have caused this whole disaster to begin with by agitating against the Big East/NBC contract (again, all rumors there).

What we Don’t Care About: The Commonwealth Accountability Testing System. I mean really, have you ever seen or taken that thing? On the geography portion, it misspelled Louisville and put the dot for it in Indiana.

How We’ve Chosen to Focus Our Disdain:  1) On each other—through questions of loyalty, courage, bravado, testosterone levels, estrogen levels, and general sporting knowledge; 2) Through clever pop-culture references including—but not limited to—The Big Lebowski, 500 Days of Summer, and OutKast. Personally, I prefer the second to the first.

Where to Place the Blame? Ah, the hardest question of all.

Given that this whole realignment shenanigan is really driven by the perception of expected football revenue, we must turn to our gridiron past. Two things come to light:  the field goal at Rutgers and the three years we would all like to have back. I'm not going to go into any more detail, but I think you get what I’m talking about. You don’t? Well good for you.

Where We Go from Here:  Well, we keep monitoring the situation, duh.

Oh, and you start rumors like nobody’s business.

Louisville to the Pac-12.

You heard it here first.