For Some People, It's More Than Just Sports

How Louisville Athletics, and One of Its All Time Greats, Changed My Life for the Better. No, Really.....

When I was born in 1980 my father had already been selling drugs for the better part of five years. After my second little sister was born and a robbery took place that could have seen us all killed, my mother began to beg my father to give up the "Easy Money" lifestyle he had been living for so long. However it was not to be, and after hearing him say "one more big deal baby and we're out" one too many times, she packed us up and left him in the middle of the night.

In the year and a half that followed, my little brother was born to a different father whom tragically died in a car accident just two weeks after the birth of his son. Three months later, and exactly 30 days short of my tenth birthday, my father was dead. Murdered at the age of 33, most likely for drugs or drug money. No one really knows because the case was never solved. At the time my mother was 28-years-old, twice a widow, four mouths to feed, and not even a high school diploma.

You see, from the time I was born, when she was 18, all my mom had to do was take care us kids and have dinner on the table. Suddenly faced with doing it all on her own she went to work doing anything she could to turn a dollar; from working in a sewing factory for minimum wage, to sweating in tobacco fields on the weekends, and sometimes cleaning the offices in her factory at night. But baby sitters and food for four kids has never been cheap and eventually she turned to the same sort of things she had left my father for a few years earlier. My father's lifestyle choice had predictably led to some pretty serious issues with drug abuse; so, I suppose that it may have been inevitable that my mother going down that same road would lead to her own issues with addiction. Specifically Crack-Cocaine.

At first we would be left with anyone who would watch us, but, as the addiction became worse and worse, she became less and less reliable to come back for us. It didn't take long for the list of baby sitters to run out, and when that happened the onus of looking after the younger kids was put on my small shoulders. I was 12 years old, living in a small trailer in the middle of nowhere, and I had two little girls and an infant in my care. I did everything for them that I thought a parent should. I cooked, cleaned, did laundry, got the girls up for school in the morning, and even walked my baby brother to the other end of our grimy trailer park so this little old lady (who my mom would pay sometimes) could watch him while I went to school.

You've all heard that saying "six degrees of separation?" Well, in a small town it's more like two; so, it didn't take long for my family to hear about what was going on and at their behest Social Services launched an investigation. However, back then, just like today, CPS was overwhelmed and understaffed. The worker assigned to our case never made an in home visit and therefore never recommended that we be removed from our mother's custody. Like I said, we were in very bad situation with no help in sight.

About the same time all of this was going on my aunt married a man who happened to be a University of Louisville Hall of Fame Player; his name was Mike Grosso. Unless you're 50+ years old, you probably don't know who he is. Luckily, a friend of theirs was involved with an organization here in Louisville that specialized in situations just like the one we were facing. CASA or, Court Appointed Special Advocates (for children) is a national non-profit volunteer based organization, with a chapter here in our city, that serves abused and neglected children every day.

CASA Volunteers are everyday heroes who speak on behalf of the most innocent of victims, children. They go into the homes of abused and neglected children; they interview parents, family members, teachers, guidance counselors, therapists, and even the children themselves. They do this in an effort to gather the most comprehensive information possible about their child so that they can make a determination about what is in that child's best interest. After that they make a recommendation to the judge presiding over the case and, believe me when I tell you that the family court judges take their opinions very-very seriously. An example of a recommendation a CASA might make is, for a group of children to be removed from their drug addicted mother and placed with their aunt and uncle while she seeks treatment and pulls her life back together.

We were placed with Mike and my aunt in the Fall of 1991. Mike was a season ticket holder in the "L Club" section of Freedom Hall, under the 2nd half home basket, right up until this year. Same section, same seats, all my life. I remember being scared when we went to stay with them and I don't even think I knew what basketball was, other than something my dad would watch on TV when some guy named "Magic" would play.

The first game I ever attended was between Louisville and Tulane. I remember walking into the Hall not really knowing why we were there and then coming up those steps for the first time. It was amazing. I had never seen anything like it in my life. I was stuck in my tracks until Mike grabbed my hand and led me to his seats. My mouth was still wide open.

I think I went to every game with him that season and I was in love from the very first one. There was a band, and when it played you could scream, "WE'RE GONNA BEAT THE HELL OUTTA YOU, YOU, YOU-YOU-YOU!!" To a kid with some anger issues that was pretty cool. The players were larger than life, there were TV cameras (TV CAMERAS!), and it sure didn't take me long to figure out what to do when everyone started clapping slowly, then faster, and faster and.....ooooooOOOO0000000(((((C!-A!-R!-D!-S!!!!-CARDS!!!!!!!

There was never any doubt about how much I loved Cardinal Basketball, and Mike Grosso knew it.

After our mother completed rehab she regained custody of us. I wish I could tell you she stayed clean for the rest of my life, but that would be a lie. She would relapse then go straight, over and over again for a long time before she got clean for good. Anyone who knows anything about addiction knows that recovery is about a lot more than 30 days to dry out and a 12-step program. Needless to say, my life and life for my siblings was very dysfunctional on into adulthood. It was made up of the things other kids made fun of: food stamps, section 8 housing, a drug-addicted mother and her alcoholic boyfriend, the list goes on. To put it mildly, things weren't very good for us.

Mike Grosso became my mentor, my father, and my hero. He would take me to Louisville Basketball and Football games, but only if I was doing well in school and staying out of trouble. He used Louisville athletics as a tool to motivate me. He used it to show me that there was more than just section 8 housing and food stamps in my future if I'd work hard and push myself.

It worked.

At 19 I joined the U.S. Navy for the first of five glorious years; it's not just a job, it really is an adventure. Today I started my last semester at the University of Louisville and in May I will graduate with a degree in Political Science. Unfortunately my story is not common enough, and stories like mine are not often heard unless you're an athlete or have the forum to share them.

Three and-a-half years ago CASA approached me and asked if I would share my story at a fund raising/volunteer recruitment event. I had just finished my first semester at Jefferson Community College and the only reason I said yes was because I had just taken a course in public speaking and done very well. I killed it and Mike would later tell me that he knew it was going to be a "Slam Dunk." I was asked to speak several more times and eventually I was asked to go to Washington D.C. as part of a lobbying effort for continued federal funding for CASA. One year later I went back and successfully helped lobby for an amendment to Title 4-E of the Social Security Act, which allocated money for children aging out of foster care to attend college. I currently work for CASA as a paid intern and I am their director of volunteer recruitment.

I don't know what is next for me but I do know one thing, I wouldn't be where I am now without Mike Grosso, Louisville Athletics, or CASA. I asked Mike Rutherford's permission to write this post because I wanted to let all of you know a few things about my organization. I also wanted to ask if anyone out there was interested in advocating for an abused or neglected child struggling in the family court system or would like to donate to our cause.

I would like to thank Mike for allowing me to use our wonderful haven for Cardinal Athletics and to ask all of you, if nothing else, to spread the word about what we at CASA do. Unfortunately we have been here since 1985 and are still relatively unknown.

A few things to know:

• Kentucky leads the Nation in child deaths related to abuse and neglect, LEADS THE NATION!
  
• Of the 48 States that have CASA programs, KY is 1 of only 6 that does not receive state funding.
• In 2010 over 3,400 children came through our family court system. Due to a lack of funding and volunteers, CASA was only able to serve about 700 of them. That's roughly 20% and that's not enough.
• CASA has the full support of the family court system, attorneys, and judges.
• The mission of CASA is not to be a mentor, rather to find a safe permanent home for a child where they can be mentored.
• Anyone can be a volunteer and, just 4-5 hours per week could have a tremendous impact on a child.
• National studies have shown that kids who have a CASA volunteer receive significantly more services and, are far more likely to NOT show up again in the system later on in life.
• Everyone knows someone who would be a good volunteer, EVERYONE!
• Remember, there are more ways to help other than donating and volunteering; but we desperately need male volunteers and donations because like many non-profits we are "in the red" right now.
• 90% of all donations go directly to our operating fund, not luxury boxes at PJCS or the YUM! Center
• Spreading the word about what CASA does could get one volunteer that could save the life of one child    
  
• Follow this link to help CASA and make a world of difference for a child.

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