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Around SBN: Diego Sanchez and the Dangers of Fame in MMA

Weakest Mascot Tournament: The South

I'm pretty certain some weak mascots came out of the Metro conference back in the day: Billikens, Cardinals, Hokies, Green Wave, 49rs. Let's take a look at the South bracket, and boy, there's some good ones.  Remember, the bolded name moves on to the next round of worthlessness. Happy March people. 

Star-divide

(1) Duke Blue Devils  vs. (16) Arkansas-Pine Bluff Golden Lions or Winthrop Eagles

This is a tough one to handicap. I hear Blue Devils, I automatically think of thisthis, and especially this. It turns out, the Blue Devils were named after a World War I Infantry Brigade. So why did the Blue Devils move on to the next round? It was a French Infantry Brigade.

(8) Cal Golden Bears vs. Louisville Cardinals

Pahleeeze. Not even the change in mascots a couple years ago could spice this one up. Actually, this is pretty spicy.

(5) Texas A&M Aggies vs (12) Utah State Aggies

Uh.......Draw? Let's go to the tape:

B949703e5e11bb3c3a9f6bc8a63ba766_medium 

Nevermind. 

(4) Purdue Boilermakers vs. (13) Siena Saints

I have always loved the Boilermaker name, even though they have a corny mascot. Also, there's a manly shot of the same name. But then again, nothing strikes fear in the hearts of foosball players like a bunch of Saints.

(6) Notre Dame Fighting Irish vs. (11) ODU Monarchs

Wow. Another tough matchup. Even with a Leprechaun for a mascot, the Irish a still much less weenier than monarchs. 

(3) Baylor Bears vs. (14) Sam Houston State Bearkats

Really, Bearkats with a K? Sam Houston was at the Battle of the Alamo and the Battle of San Jacinto, and all he gets is a misspelled mascot? 

(7) Richmond Spiders vs. (10) St. Mary's Gaels

Arachnophobia or fair-haired people from the British Isles?

(2) Villanova Wildcats vs. (15) Robert Morris Colonials

You see that Sam Houston State. Cats with a C.

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Round of 32

(1) Duke Blue Devils vs. (9) Louisville Cardinals

The Cards in a landslide

(5) Texas A&M Aggies vs. (13) Sienna Saints

Aggie. Short for agriculture.

(11) ODU Monarchs vs (14) Sam Houston State Bearkats

(10) St. Mary's Gaels vs. (15) Robert Morris Colonials

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm just going to skip ahead to the Great 8:

(9) Louisville Cardinals  vs.  (10) St. Mary's Gaels

My little cousin saw the Cardinal Bird on tv and said "Man, that's one mean chicken!"  That mean chicken is still no match for the likes of the Gaels. Congrats St. Mary's. You're final 4 bound.

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But our bird has teeth

Doesn’t that count for something? FWIW, I still think that Oski looks like something out of an after-school special.

What’s with the various mascots for “Aggie” schools? Texas A&M (College Station) uses a collie, Utah State uses a bull, and New Mexico State uses a cowboy. Can they just share Herbie Husker?

Speaking of fight songs, it should be noted that both UC-Berkley and UC-Los Angeles still share theirs. Separation anxiety?

The ND yard gnome less wimpy than an ODU lion? May this guy have mercy.

by 520Card on Mar 17, 2010 1:03 PM EDT reply actions  

Also how does our Cardinal Bird not lose to Gaels?

I mean the Gaelics were fucking awesome. Couldn’t they just shoot the bird with an arrow or something?

by Chris Redman is my hero on Mar 17, 2010 1:17 PM EDT reply actions  

Purdue mascot is manly gay

Just like the Steelers mascot, Steely McBeam, or as others have labeled him:

  • Fisty McBendover
  • Kordell Stewart

Not that there’s anything wrong with that

ThreadKiller

by mclade01 on Mar 17, 2010 8:56 PM EDT reply actions  

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