After reviewing each and every one of the numerous submissions, I've narrowed the field to four. Thanks to the many who participated in what will surely end up being the most important process in all of our lives.
Some people felt Almost Snapping Eric Wood deserved another chance, you know, since he hasn't actually lost. So the incumbent is finalist #1.
Finalist No.2: Actively Smooching Cardinal Bird.
No. 3, and the apparent favorite: Pipe-Smoking Schnelly.
And finally, fully embracing the randomness that it may take to pull this one out: Milk Chug.
The voting ends at midnight on Friday...or the last time I check the site before I fall asleep.
The fate of French Polynesia and the U of L football program rests in the balance.