I swear to god, I opened this document and started laughing before I could type anything. There's simply no other move at this point.

U of L announced tonight that redshirt freshman quarterback Matt Simms has been suspended four games for an undisclosed violation of team rules.

Hmm. Four games. Undisclosed violation of team rules...

I'm gonna say...traffic violation? 

It needs to be said: weed just isn't that awesome, guys. At least not awesome enough that it's impossible to stay away from for like four months every year. And definitely not awesome enough to jeopardize your chances of being a three-year starter at quarterback for the University of Louisville.

There are like 15 other quarterbacks on this roster, and three or four of them are pretty comparable in skill level. Surely, Simms had to have been at least partially aware of this.

You had me, Matty. It took some work, but damnit, you had me. All you needed to do was lay off the cheeba for a couple of months and continue the remarkable progress that you've made over the past year. That or score some clean piss.

Point, Wolfe/Burke/Stoudt.